Looking for mentors

Preparing for all of the new leaders

My last blog post was an attempt to distinguish two different leadership styles, a direct and a very defined directive of expectations and a softer more subtle and encouraging approach. In the boxing gym and as a Navy SEAL the first more stringent manner of leadership is what I became accustomed to. However I stumbled onto the benefit of encouragement when I trained military dependent kids while I was stationed in the Republic of Panama.  I had a kid that I could not force to do anything and then one day he threw a left hook perfectly, on his own and I noticed and got all excited about it and before I knew it he was doing all kinds of things right and so were the other kids after hearing the praise I directed toward him. Then I heard a quote by Dexter Yeager the top producer for AMWAY as “You can only get negative when the horse is in the barn”. Then when I joined Toastmaster in 1994 I was part of a really good group, a whole bunch of us joined around the same time and the club sponsored a Speech Crafters training and six of us all reach the level of Certified Toastmaster at the same time. It was exciting to see that kind of participation.

I have just recently been elected to the position of Vice President of Public Relations for HUB CityToastmasters and at the new officers training the announced that Toastmasters International is changing their member development to be more customized by actually finding out what the Toastmasters member wish to accomplish and actually define which skills they wish to develop through Toastmasters. This got me so excited! If someone wishes to become a better teacher or trainer, work on sales presentations, become a motivational or entertaining speaker. Now the individual Toastmaster can determine exactly the direction they wish to go and how fast they get there. If they wish to be pushed and perfected they can choose will do that for them or if they wish a more subtle manner of drawing their natural talents as they are ready for them to come out they can choose to be mentored in this fashion also. It is up to the individual and their own expectations. I am so excited about this new development but it will not be implemented until November but between now and then we need to gear up and bring in Toastmasters who are up to the task of developing these new members who are going to line up to map their own success through Toastmasters.

HUB City Toastmasters meets Wednesdays 12:00 p.m. to 1:00 p.m. at the Pharr Memorial Library, 121 E. Cherokee, 2nd floor Meeting Room, in Pharr TX. https://www.facebook.com/HUBCityToastmasters1297787.

 

Masters of Leadership

How are we leading?

It is always funny how when I talk about my wife Janice Wright the first mention is that she’s a certified John Maxwell Leadership trainer. I have always been fascinated by leadership. I remember trying categorize all of the forms of leadership; Leadership by example, Leadership by influence and leadership by directive or proclamation. Leadership by example is the most utilized, that is what you do by training in sports or on the job training….etc. Then there is Leadership by influence, which is where you have established enough credibility where you have authority because you have proven yourself with the fruit on the tree. Then there is Leadership by Discernment where you take the time to actually get to know someone and tailor your instruction to meet their manner of learning or acceptance and communicate with them in that manner. Leadership by directive or proclamation is like the military’s UCMJ or the Ten Commandments. This type of leadership is used when the individual with the knowledge isn’t around to lead by example. So there are a couple of issues with it, first it is left up to interpretation and people can modify it according to their understanding of the wording. It is good for self-starters, people with initiative. They use the rules to keep them between the shoulders so to speak. The challenge I always noticed while I was in the military is that people considered the UCMJ as the baseline minimum requirements to not be punished and that is all that they would do.

 

I love Toastmasters but I have also seen clubs bend the rules/guidelines so much they the members either don’t get the full benefit of Table Topics for example or they are to ridged when it comes to the discretion of the Toastmaster in setting up the theme of the meeting or introduction of the speakers. It works best to have someone who knows the flow and provides an example of how the guidelines or directive have to be followed.

Usually leadership by Influence has to be witnessed and deemed effective by someone else who will edify the leader. I have seen this many times with sales trainers. It creates an expectation that the leader is going to say something that can completely change your outcome. This can work without taking the time to actually discover the needs and expectations of your audience. Have a level of desire and expectations which they looking for a clue in the information the leader is imparting on them they will use as a road sign to point them in the right direction that they can stand on the gas and go full speed in that direction towards success.

I have witnessed awesome leaders in the Navy SEALs who had the fruit on the tree as far as respect and recognition, you knew they knew what they were doing because of the respect they were given with their area of expertise and they would show how good they were at it too. They used leadership by directive very well, their directive and you had no other choice but to do things their way or else! Not too many of them exercised leadership by discernment. They didn’t care what your dreams, needs or desires were except to keep them off of your back.

If you don’t have that kind of clout to make someone do what they are supposed to do or the fruit on the tree giving you influence you can get it through discernment by really caring enough about whoever you are trying to lead and by listening you can figure out exactly what they want or need and even exactly how they desire to obtain it. Once you show someone how to get what they are asking for they will accept your leadership. Both my wife Janice Wright and my son Devin Lowing are masterful at this.

Devin on his job with Solar City in San Diego has an uncanny ability to get people who initially say “No” to say “Yes”. Gets them to tell him why they are saying no then he explains how whatever issue they have a concern about can be solved. Then they have to have it.

Janice is pleasant, serving and she listens. People open up to her and she puts her heart into getting what it is that they need. She is patient and comforting making them feel good about her and then she either gives them what they are asking for, shows them how and where they can get it or lets them know that she is in the business of making it happen for them. It is really her example of being warm, comforting and understanding and then she pulls out her knowledge and competence on top of that. I had to have her in my life.

It is one thing to understanding these methods of leadership, it is another thing to put them in effect and you become a master leader when you know how and when to use them all. In the Bible on the Ten Commandments is where “Leadership by Directive” is used. The rest of the bible is leadership by example by the stories of those with faith and some example of leadership by discernment by Ruth and Ester and especially by Jesus Christ and Apostle Paul use every form of leadership and what is ideal.  

Ovum Ministries

The Ovum Ministries

For a very long time I have wanted to start a young men’s empowerment movement. This even before my revelation that God and Jesus Christ is real. I have trained kids boxing in Pensacola and in Panama but that was just part of the whole developmental process which really needed to be developed in me. Then I would lead a BUD/s PT at the Sports Park in Imperial Beach CA. with the kids from Church of His Kingdom and that expanded into Kim’s Game and Hash Runs without alcohol.

Now I have been trying to organize a BUD/s PT at the Edinburg Municipal Park on Saturday mornings but the participation has been light and recently I have started attending the men’s bible study at Center Chruch in Pharr, TX. They are covering the book “The Holy Spirit” by John Bevere and it starts at 8:30 AM. Now the Pastor of Center Church is Pastor Stevens and the very first time I heard him speak he got my attention, especially when he came off of the stage proclaiming “This church is going to be lead by the spirit and if any of you don’t like it, there is the door!” Then he said “I have a job to support my ministry hobby” and “I am going to collect my treasure in Heaven”. So my Saturday, full BUD/s PT I will either have to do at 6:00 AM at home on my own or sometime after the Men’s bible study.

Now something is in the works. I volunteered two weeks in a row with the Edinburg JROTC on Fridays doing the full BUD/s PT. I lead an 8:30 AM class and a 2:00 PM class one week and then a 10:00 AM class and 11:00 AM class the next Friday. Now I concerned that my workout would be enough for these kids but after the second set of push-ups I didn’t have to worry about that anymore. However in the evenings at the Fight House Boxing Gym down the road towards the south there are some tough kids who can keep up with the workouts but either don’t have the grades, dropped out of school or have criminal convictions. They couldn’t get into the SEAL Teams if they wanted to. I wish the military had a redemption program for kids like this, kind of like in the movie “The Dirty Dozen” where these kids who are tough, unafraid of other men and life could get their GED or take high school equivalency test and qualify for the different jobs like the SEALs, EOD, 2^nd Class Divers, Rescue Swimmer, Army Rangers, and Para Rescue. It amazes me how these fighters aren’t afraid of a man 20 lbs heavier than they are but don’t give them a math problem.

So then Thursday night I get invited to the Texas A&M Admissions office in McAllen to see a presentation for “Trial Life” organization a faith based version of the Boy Scouts. My wife and I were the only ones to show up for the presentation but I spoke with Pastor Steven and he is interested in Center Church sponsoring a troop of the “Trail Life” boys. His is into the outdoors, canoeing and paddle boarding. Then this morning while my wife and I were on our way to church out battery went dead and we had TV church today and we watched “The Rock” church in San Diego with Miles McPherson. Then besides that she had me watch “The Bema Seat” Pastor Tim Stevenson. This was right in line with Pastor Steven’s message of creating my treasure in Heaven.

I started to think about my wife Janice Wright's ministry “Titus Ministries” for young mothers and teen girls and even though I want to incorporate the Navy SEAL “BUD/s” PT and I want to develop these young men to be able to pass BUD/s screen test if they decide to go that way but they don’t have to if they don’t want to but my motivation for the strenuous workout is to build confidence, comradery and stimulate their endorphins which activates the creative part of the brain so these tough kids can learn the math and science they need to be well rounded. I didn’t want to call it “Tadpole Ministries” because that is what they call actual trainees who are in BUD/s training and “Frog Egg Ministries” didn’t really suit me. So I looked up the scientific name for “Frog Eggs” and I found “Ovum” which means eggs of frogs and toads but it is also used in describing an undeveloped fertilized egg. Basically undeveloped potential. That struck a nerve with me. These young men who want recognition and attention but do not know the difference between good attention and bad attention or realize their own potential and capabilities. To tell the truth, my purpose is to give them a head start. I remember Roy Jones Jr. at 12 and 13 years old trying to keep up with me in push-ups, arms circles and leg-lifts and the next thing I know he surpasses me. My son Devin Lowing did the same thing. I want to be a measuring stick or reference for them to achieve more.